Yesterday morning, 3am to be exact, Amber lost her other front tooth.  It is now safe to call her a Toothless wonder and make fun of the way she talks.  It is a wonder that we can still understand her and it is a wonder her tongue hasn’t escaped.  Dum da!!! 

Since it was 3 in the morning, the Toothfairy was off the clock.  Besides, when you sleep in someone else’s bed it is hard for the Toothfairy to find the tooth and make sure the money is given to the right person.  In these economic times, the Toothfairy can’t afford to just go around all willy nilly putting dollars under just anyone’s pillows.  I would hate for her to be brought in front of Congress and drill on why she needs a bailout and the President, now, feels it necessary to take over her operation.  So with all that explained, we told Amber to remember to put her tooth under her pillow.  She understood. 

Last night we failed at Operation Non-Cranky.  We had to wait for SoHubby to get home from work so we could go see the Easter Bunny and, because it seemed such a waste to just go home after only an hour out, we decided to walk around to kill some time and then have dinner.  Do you see our problem?  I think living closer to civilization may help with our mission of getting the kids to bed at a decent time.  When it takes 30 minutes to get anywhere you really want to make it worth it.  We get home a little after 8pm and the kids rush around to getting for bed.  Amber remembers to put her little tooth under pillow with much fanfare.  I made a mental note to put a dollar under her pillow before we went to bed.  Wait!  Rewind that.  I made a mental note to tell SoHubby to put the dollar under her pillow and snag the tooth.  I trust him on these kinds of sneaky missions, because I don’t want to be the one that is caught red handed and have that talk.  And it is nice to have someone else to blame the destruction of innocence on . 

After the kids were in bed, us, adults, went downstairs to turn our brains to mush.  Sure the kids started the process with all their fighting in the car and the assurances that, yes, they are big boys and will sit on the Easter Bunny’s lap, then throws a hellish tantrum and only agrees to take the picture sitting next to his sister clutching his dinosaurs.  *sigh*  We settled in to watch 88 minutes (So not a good movie.  Attention directors and producers, Al Pacino is an old man and no amount of dialogue will change that.  Okay?  Okay!).  Then it was time for bed for me.  I walk upstairs and jump in bed.  Not one thought of the Toothfairy or the disappointment Amber might feel once she woke up to find no money, but a stale, bloody tooth under her pillow. 

The panic would set in when I woke up this morning faced with a little sad face telling me how the Toothfairy didn’t come.  I contained my horror and told her to try again tonight.  SoHubby went a bit further and told Amber to put the tooth closer to the edge of her pillow so it is easier for the ToothFairy.  Yeah, blame the child for the lack of paying for teeth protcol.  So, now, I have to figure out a way to get my old brain to remember ALL DAY to put a stinkin’ dollar under the pillow and take my child’s tooth tonight when she is fast asleep.  This is why people have children young.

UPDATE:  Apparently, SoHubby read this post shortly after I published it and went into action.  I heard him run upstairs while Amber and I were in the playroom.  Then we heard him run back downstairs and fall on his ass.  I was wondering what the hell was he doing running up and down the stairs when he has hurt himself the same way about 5 year ago.  As he limped away from the stairs, SoHubby explains that he ran upstairs to put a dollar under Amber’s pillow and take the tooth.  And Amber has no clue that her daddy risked life and limb just so she could still believe in the Toothfairy and was not forgotten.  She, also, has a cool story to tell anyone, and everyone, that will listen that the Toothfairy came while she was awake and playing downstairs.  Not really a problem when the Toothfairy is trying to save her/his reputation.