I am not too upset over this Miley Cyrus business (I didn’t totally unexpect it), but I am upset with the people that shove it under the rug and then walk around the lump pretending it doesn’t exist. I have reach a place in my life where I am the very uncool and very old woman. I am shocked at the lack of respect and blatant disregard for manners in young people these days and that proves I am ready for my cane and adult diapers.
First off, I have a problem with parents whoring (yes, whoring) their children out for a buck. I don’t care how wholesome you start out the pressure and lure of show business gets to everyone involved and they start to do stupid things. Why can’t all these kids with talent stay in the school talent show, play and drama clubs to hone their craft and then when they are adults make their way through Hollywood? And is it so great to be washed up at 18 yrs old? Sure you got money, but what else are you going to do with your life?
Back to the Miley Cyrus cover and the out/under rage this seems to be causing. Why is it upsetting? Because you got a 15 yr old looking like she is getting up from a nice romp in the sack. We already got Jamie Lynn Spears knocked up by either a 18 yr old or 30 something yr old. Can someone say Statutory Rape? But we are suppose to support and feel pity for her. Then there is the “Well, they are going to do it anyway” defense. I guess all of us parents should throw up our hands and stop parenting because it won’t matter anyway.
I understand that chidren have their own opinions and parents can’t control everything. Hell, I was down on Bourbon street at 16 yr old getting into clubs and nursing an alcholic drink. But you know what I, also, carried with me? The incredible fear of what my mom would do to me if she caught me. And guess what she ALWAYS caught me. She ALWAYS knew what I was up to. Not a bad thing to have in your arensal as a parent? That fear kept me from sneaking out of my bedroom window at night, getting involved in drugs, drinking until I dropped and getting frisky with some boy in the backseat of a car. All it took was a little boundary check from mom, which involved removing anything that was of value to me for a lenghty amount of time.
Does this work for all kids, maybe not, but I am shocked when I hear what parents are doing. Just in this “What is the big deal” post, the blogger talks of parties where there is underage drinking, parents smoking pot and girls making out with each other to impress boys. Um, could someone maybe pick up a phone and call the cops, because I am sure 2 out 3 of those things are illegal, at least down here in the state of Louisiana.
And we wonder why our children act the way they do? It is not because of Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears or Lindsey Lohan, but because of their parents. These parents seem so involved in making a buck that none of them have stepped up and put their foot down. You better be damn sure that if I was faced with my daughter topless with sex tousled hair and a sheet, cameras would have been stopped and my daughter off the set. What I suspect happen is that the parents, themselves didn’t want to appear uncool or hurt their daughters’ careers? Why is it okay to throw our children to the lions so no one says a bad word about us?
In line with being the cranky old lady, I have come to not care what people think. You say I am a prude? So what! You say I am mean? So what! You say I am out of touch? So be it! I. DON’T. CARE! I want my children to know that I am their parent and what I say goes. And they maybe unpopular with the rest of the teen world, but maybe I won’t have any new babies to take care of or drug rehabs to find. Never say never, but always be prepared.
Note: I didn’t provide any pictures, because 1. you can find them all over the Internet and 2. I am not going to add to the freak show that is Hollywood’s kiddie business. As for Disney, maybe they should stick to the actors that are drawn; they are easily controlled.
Remember celebrity tweens of yesteryear? Like Debbie Gibson and Tiffany, who didn’t get pregnant or flash their bra at 15? Ahhhh, those were the good ol’ days, huh?
And how come Drake and Josh aren’t being posed in semi-sexual photos by Glamour or Vanity Fair? I wonder if they are on myspace flashing their boxer briefs. Hmmmm.
Perhaps for as far as women have come, we haven’t come that far after all. We are still being trained from an early age that who we are is all tied up with how sexual we can be.
AW! Heather you have said it beautifully. I totally agree.
It is the parents. I don’t understand how these parents can look themselves in the mirror.
Judge not until ye have teenagers of your own. Seriously. I was all, “Who are these parents that let their children behave this way?!” until I had teenage girls. And my girls actually don’t give us much trouble. They do tell us what goes on at school though. And… whoa.
I don’t think you’re a prude. My issue with this whole things is this: Miley, Disney, etc. are so quick to put the blame on VF and the photographer but not on themselves. Hello! Was her Dad not there? Did he not take other pics with her? Does she not have a brain and think with it? I think that if she’s going to say that anyone was to blame she needs to say that she made a mistake and she’s to blame too. Blame her handlers if she wants but blame herself and her Daddy as well. Isn’t there a saying about when you point your finger at someone and there’s always fingers pointing back at you? I’m not trying to judge her in any way or her family b/c I wasn’t there but I wholeheartedly (is that all one word?) believe that if you’re going to start playing the blame game she has to blame herself and her Daddy too. She might only be 15 but good God, 15yr olds these days are WAY smarter than they were in my day. I’m not old, I’m 29, but I have a younger sister, she’s 19, and she knew more things when she was growing up than I did at her age and I was in no way sheltered. Just my two cents.
Suburban Turmoil,
I agree and I think all the time how I will respond when I have teenagers. I do know that I will be the very uncool parens who will call the police if I am told that there is underage drinking going on.
The blame must be put somewhere and it belongs on the parents. They are the ones allowing this stuff to go, so when their teenagers (not speaking of yours) are out of control they only have themselves to blame.
Mishel,
I think it is wrong to say that Miley herself should have said something. She is only 15 yr old and even though she is a big star still looks to adults for guidance. I think her father and the other adults involved should have spoken up. I believe they got caught up in the glamour of having a famous photographer taking pictures of their little girl. The hardest thing about this parenting gig is to put aside what you want and do what is best for the kids.
I have faced this situation with Amber’s dance class. Are the songs they use appropriate for the age? Is the dances too suggestive? I am not fond of my little 6 yr old shaking her butt, but at this point it is not as bad as I have heard other dance schools doing. But you bet your sweet bottom that if I hear a song or see a dance that I don’t think is appropriate for my daughter the instructor and owner will hear about it. If it doesn’t change then Amber will be yanked from that dance school. It is all about teaching our kids to respect themselves and not to be treated as a sexual being before their time.
I’ll concede that she shouldn’t have been the one to say something, solely based on her age, but for Disney, her family, etc. to start placing blame solely on VF and Annie L. (I can’t spell her last name) is a bit ridiculous to me. I bought People Magazine and they had an article in it and if you listen to Disney the pic was taken after her parents left BUT her Grandmother and a handler were with her and if you listen to the other side they’re saying that ‘No’ her parents were they and in fact viewed the pics before the went to print. So which is it? I just don’t like that blame is being put solely on one party when it just seems like there were more than one party of people at that photo shoot. It’s like in my life I hate when blame is placed on one person if five people messed up. If five people messed up than five people should get scolded versus one. Same thing when something great is done and it’s done by like three people but only one is singled out for doing it. How’s that fair? That’s all I’m trying to say in a weird way: blame should go around to everyone who was there and had a hand in it and no one, except the 15-yr old, should be let off of it. As for Miley, even she said in the article (I’m not putting it word for word but paraphrasing): she’s young; she’s going to make mistakes; and she’s sorry.